The Painful Truth
Posted by harlan on 28 Mar 2008 at 01:29 pm | Tagged as: talking to the void
After some very difficult soul searching, I’ve decided I need to come clean: I did not in fact consummate my relationship with B. (and what’s so wrong with the word consummate anyway?). In fact, I was no where near B. last night. I just said that to cover up a much worse experience, which I didn’t want to tell about. I didn’t want to even think about it, but it’s not the kind of experience I can just sweep under the rug. Though believe me, I’ve tried.
I’ll be the first to admit that not everything I’ve posted here has necessarily put me in the best possible light. But I figure it’s sort of like cheap therapy, since I assume that therapists cost more than internet connections. Anyway, today’s the first day that I’m hesitant to tell you about something that happened to me, because it’s so humiliating. I’m getting shaky even just remembering it, much less writing about it. But I think I need to, for me more than anything, because I need to start facing up to things.
So…deep breath. Last night I got busted. Not busted like telling someone you had a doctor’s appointment and then having them run into you at the mall. I mean busted like by cops and put in handcuffs and taken to the police station. Busted like one of those pathetic tards on that show Cops that I absolutely can’t stand to watch but practically have to, it’s so awful. There’s one thing for which I’ll always be eternally grateful: at least I wasn’t in my underwear at the time. Which I say now, but oh my god, it was horrible.
First off, even though shoplifting has gotten harder over the years, what with those stupid cameras in the black bubbles and theft prevention systems at the doorways and stuff, you’d be surprised how easy it is to get around all that. So says the guy who just spent the night in lock-up. Never having had any trouble for all those years, I guess I got cocky. I mean, of course I know that stores have security people. I’m not an idiot. Okay, I take it back. I am an idiot. I still can’t figure out who nabbed me, because I’m pretty sure I had all the cameras scoped out, and there wasn’t anyone I could see on my aisle. All I was after was some stupid fucking pens, too. I like the expensive kind, with the ink that flows nicely and writes even when the paper gets oily, because I have oily skin. Have you priced decent pens? It’s an outrage.
Anyway, as I left the store, some doofus security guy with a buzz cut came after me and told me to please come back into the store. My answer? “No thanks, I really gotta get home.” I think that’s what I said. I know for sure I said, “No thanks.” No thanks? He took out his little store security badge and flashed it all badass, and in his other hand, he had the ripped open pen packaging that I’d left in the Rubbermaid section. “I’m not asking, sir. I need you to come with me.”
For one split second, I honestly considered trying to make a run for it. I mean, Brad or Nathan or Scooter or whatever his name was wasn’t all that big, and at that point, he was solo (two bigger guys showed up about 30 seconds later). But then I saw that on his belt he had a taser. I nearly shit my pants. I caved like a cheap card table.
Man I wish I’d gone for it! Don’t you have times like that, when you wished you had been bold, even to the point of stupidity? I’ve always dreamed of being that kind of guy who’s just a crazy motherfucker, who’ll do anything, just because it seems like a good idea at the time. Because we all love people like that. How great would this blog entry be if I could have told you that I made a run for it, and was running all Crazy Legs Comanche across the parking lot, while Nate accidentally tasered some old lady? Even if I didn’t get away, it would be a great story. As it was, I just went quietly with Nazi Nate so I wouldn’t get tasered.
The two bigger guys showed up right away, like I said, as Nate was escorting me back to the store. They took me up a stairway near the front of the store and through a door with an Employees Only sign, and then back into a little empty room with a table. Are there enough shoplifting busts at a place like that that they actually have a shoplifting interrogation room built right into the floor plan? It seemed that way. One of the big guys stayed with me and told me that the police had been called, and would be arriving shortly. He put the opened pen package on the table between us, like it was supposed to make me sweat or something, and then asked, “Do you have something you’d like to explain?” “No,” I said. “We know you took these pens,” he said. It went on like this for a few minutes, until the cop came. She asked me to stand up and lift up my arms, and then she patted me down and found the pens in an inside pocket of my jacket.
The cop said, “Would you like to explain this?”
“There’s nothing to explain,” I said. “Those are mine.”
She made a really exaggerated scoffing sound. “Unfortunately, for you, we have a witness who can testify that you took those out of this package. So don’t make this any harder on yourself than you need to. If you cooperate now, it’ll go better for you,” she said. Or something like that.
But hey, I’ve watched enough Law & Order to know that it never goes better for you if you confess, so I just said I wanted to speak to my attorney. Haha. What a laugh. As if I have an attorney. But it seemed like the right thing to say. “Have it your way,” said the cop. That’s when she took the handcuffs off her belt and started reading me my rights.
“Hold it,” I said, is that absolutely necessary?”
“I’m afraid it is, without a signed confession,” she said, and then she cuffed me. Let me tell you, handcuffs aren’t just for show. They hurt, especially when the cop kind of yanks on your arms to get them on you. The worst part of it was when she took me back downstairs and I suddenly realized in a more visceral way that I was about to be paraded in front of every damn customer out of the store in cuffs. Who knew who was in that store? B. could be in that store, for all I knew. I knew for a fact that she shopped there sometimes. What did I do? I started fucking crying.
That’s right. I cried like a stupid little kid. It kind of caught me by surprise. The horrible thing is that sometimes when you cry, it stings like a motherfucker, which makes you cry even worse, and makes snot literally flow out of your nose. So off I went, Peter Perp, bodily fluids streaming down my face, paraded as an object lesson in front of all those customers. There have been a lot of awful moments in my life, but this walk of shame ranks way up there.
Once we got to the cop car, the cop pushed me down inside and I banged my head on the doorway. The backseats of cop cars are no picnic either. They don’t really leave any room for your knees, especially when you’re sitting awkwardly with your hands behind your back. And I’m not a very tall guy either. And then the siren woops woops and the lights are flashing and away you go, with everyone nearby giving that sad “what a shame” head shake in your direction.
The cop looked in the rear-view mirror and noticed I was crying.
“Oh, sweetie, just let it out,” she said. “Don’t be afraid. Just let it awwwwll out.”
I cried even harder, even though I knew she was probably mocking me. Once we got to the police station, the tears had pretty much stopped flowing, but my nose was still running. Then, they take you inside and bore you to death. Every last part of the tedious process, searching and fingerprinting and photos and filling out forms, took forever. I swear they must do that on purpose. Finally, after what seemed like it must be hours, some obviously bored detective took me to a little room and asked me, sort of like the first cop had done, to confess my crime, because it would go a lot easier on me. He gave me a form to write out my confession. I refused to cooperate. This guy didn’t even bother trying. “Whatever you say, Sport,” he said. He actually called me “Sport.” “We got a witness, so it doesn’t really matter what you say,” he said all smugly. Then he gave me information about bail and told me I could make my phone call.
I was stumped. Up until that point, I hadn’t really given any of this much thought. The whole attorney thing was a big lie, of course, so there was no attorney to call. Just who could I call? I wasn’t about to give my sister the satisfaction, and I just don’t know all that many people well enough to call them up and ask them to come down and post $400 in bail. I thought about calling Richard, but he hadn’t even been very nice the last time I talked to him. I wasn’t about to call B. I asked the detective, who was filling out paper work, if he had any suggestions.
“You’re asking me?” he said.
“Yeah, I’m asking you.”
“You don’t have a brother or something?”
“No,” I lied.
“I don’t know. Bail bonds, I guess, though they don’t usually do little stuff like this. But try it if you want.”
He gave me a card, a really terrible looking business card with a tacky logo that was a ripoff of the Bond 007 theme. Finally, I just decided what the hell, where do I have to be anyway? I’m unemployed. I mean, it would be one thing if I had to be at a job in the morning. So I didn’t call anyone, and by this time it was like 2:00 in the morning anyway, so they just put me back in that little cell.
Now, it’s not like I expect your sympathy, because I have a pretty good idea of what you think of me. You’ve been pretty up front in some of your rude comments about how you think my life is a train wreck. In truth, maybe my life is a train wreck, and maybe I deserve your contempt. Maybe I even want your contempt, in some weird, twisted way. Maybe that’s the real reason I keep this blog. I dunno. But that jail cell was horrible. Not just because it was small and cold, or because of the flickering cold neon light that made you feel like you’re in the Matrix, or because the thin little mattresses on the bunk beds are hard and lumpy. The thing that got to me the most was having to use that little metal toilet that just stuck out of the wall, without anything vaguely like privacy. It’s a horrible feeling to have to sit on that cold toilet and take a dump, in plain sight of anyone who might happen to walk by, even if no one did happen to walk by. I won’t even discuss the sandpaper consistency toilet paper.
This morning they took me to court for arraignment, which is a story in itself, but I’m way too tired to try to tell it now. Maybe later.
I don’t know what I’m going to tell B.
Just tell her what you told us. You were humiliated and you learned your lesson. Everyone screws up a million times in their life. Move on. It really is not the end of the world. If this is something that really upsets B. then so what? She will get upset and either not want to see you anymore (and in that case she is a bitch) or move on as well. No point in freaking out about it.
Oh man - B going to freak because a) you didn’t show up for your fifth date and b) now you’re a criminal? From what I’ve gathered in your past posts, wouldn’t she have broke into your place (sick with worry) to find you? And how ’bout that taser…I’ve never seen a security guard with one. Where the hell were you shopping?
What are you going to tell B? The title of your post says it all.
Hey Stephen King,
That was a good one.
Thank God Almighty! You didn’t really do it with Bertha! Better a month in the worst Colombian prison than an evening of “consummating your love.”
Who’s to say he didn’t consummate his love with one of his new prison friends?
That would be little different than Bertha, Ryan.
Point taken. Thanks.
this just gets better and better!!!!!!!!
How sad for you. An arrest really takes away a lot of your options. Jobs, travel, financial stuff. For a few pens? Wow. I wouldn’t be surprised if Bertha walked away from this. I certainly wouldn’t date a guy that had been arrested. But there is a silver lining. Being a convict opens up a whole new world of women!
Stealing $15 worth of pens is a Class C offense. That’s no worse than a speeding ticket. You’ll probably have to pay a fine and do some community service. I really wouldn’t sweat it. Don’t waste money on a lawyer, plead out and get on with your life.
But seriously, stop shoplifting. If you got caught doing it again you’d be VERY fucked.
And men!
Your life doesn’t have to be a train wreck. You make the choices and there are consequences. As long as you continue your present path you the least you can expect is more of the same, but eventually worse. Own up, grow up, and be a man. Or not.
One more thing - don’t ever think people can’t and don’t care about you. Quit being a user and you’ll see.
Here’s another lesson learned Harlan. I think this is as low as you can go now. So there’s only better things to come. Please just assure us that this is the end of it.
Jeez, that was not that horrible, it’s not like felony or anything. It’s petty theft, you never thought you were going to get caught and never wanted to hurt anyone. It’s just the shame that you are feeling now. Life is not over, sheesh, it is not that bad. Just learn from it and move on.
Don’t tell B. anything, don’t tell ANYONE.
OH YEA, you missed your date with B.
oh well, i guess you have to tell her. Its a good test see if she really cares enough to stick around. Its not that horrible, just tell her that it was an impulse you acted on and you are very ashamed and very sorry.
I’ve been there - you’ll get a $285 fine and 8 hours of community service. I never paid my fine or did my service and it’s been 5 years. My life motto - ignore it and it will go away.
http://money.cnn.com/2006/07/13/news/companies/walmart_shoplifters/index.htm
Was it more than $25?
I just stopped by Wal-mart. I usually don’t go there, even though I’m an asshat, but my printer ran out of ink and they’re the only place around who sells the cartridges. I admired the pens, briefly, and didn’t see any over $25.00. So maybe not much will happen to Harlan. I did have a sudden impulse to try to put a few under my coat but resisted. I think I’ve been reading this blog too much.
Did you ever hear the story about the little boy who cried wolf? Now I don’t even try to believe a shred of what you are saying.
Awesome story line Harlan. Fiction stories are the best!
I’m absolutely certain of one thing; Harlan didn’t try to steal some pens.
Something tells me that he wasn’t in Wal-Mart or an office supply store.
Lets see if we can deduce this Sherlock Holmes style:
1) He was going to have “The Sex Date” with B. that night.
2) He has zero self confidence.
3) He squirts in his pants just from kissing.
4) He spends A LOT of time on the internet.
Lets see…if we add up 1-4 I think, we can say with some certainty that Harlan went to some Adult Toy Store to buy some accessories for his sex date.
He was too embarrassed to actually buy the combo dildo/vibrator/paint shaker and the Dr. No Feel numbing solution, so he tried to steal them. Sex shops being what they are, have more security than Ft. Knox, and since Harlan probably doesn’t have any “experience” in this arena, he had no idea that walking out of Wal-Mart with a propane grill is like stealing candy from a baby compared to trying to rip off a sex shop.
Poor guy never stood a chance.
Oh and “Nate” and the two burly guys have a 99% chance of being a 22 year old woman with a lip ring, black fishnet tights and a short plaid skirt.
The only detail I’m not certain of is where Harlan tried to hide the dildo as he walked out of the shop…
The dildo was hidden in the same place from which Harlan pulled this storyline.
“So…deep breath”. Not that it matters, but this statement tells us why “Harlan” isn’t into Bertha and sabotages all of his relationships with women. He’s totally gay.
And dude, if even 1/4 of what you’ve told us is true you need to find the highest building in your city and jump.
If it isn’t, as Asshat so eloquently put it in the above post…your story line has become really shitty.
BTW, Leland, was that deduction done by Sherlock Holmes or John Holmes?
I think Harlan is the kind of guy that would be too embarrassed in an ‘adult’ store.
I don’t think you’re any better or worse than other people, Harlan. Compulsive liar, maybe. I can’t believe I missed the first post and read this one first! It’s like seeing the wrong episode of Lost! Grrr.
I’ve known people who worked at Office Depot and WalMart. They said there was so much shoplifting that the cops wouldn’t even bother to come and arrest people anymore. Now they just write them a petty theft ticket and you show up in court just like a traffic ticket. The little thieves just pay a fine and court costs and bye-bye. So the handcuffs and cell time might have been a little over the top Harlan. And the cops are really good about pushing your head down so you don’t bang it when you get in the car. Little details count Harlan.
We are all of us at one time or another a train-wreck.
You are speaking to that part of us that knows this.
Get some sleep, sweet thing. Life will look better with some strength and a bit of self-examination.
Okay, Darkhorse is totally Amy in disguise.
Who says ’sweet thing’? Eww!
And honestly, for H, self-examination = self-combustion!
hmmm so this is isn’t real???
then how am I suppose to feel better about MY life now.
Whoa. I got nothing. Good luck!
The second cop wasn’t legally allowed to question you because you had asked for your lawyer. They know better than to do that.
Grrr. GRRRR.
tsk tsk. another one of those. and i thought things have changed around here. too bad.
Oh Amy, get over it.
somebody needs to call A&E and get an intervention started for good ol’ harlan
i’m just not sure if its for gambling, shoplifting, lying or meth abuse
Jeez, look at all the fun I miss when I’m gone a couple of days!
Darkhorse is probably B.
FK
Fat Kid, we already covered this. All of us are Harlan.
Is this an early April Fool’s Day joke?
Jen, there are plenty of fools involved, but I don’t think it has anything to do with April, who ever that is…unless April is really B.
But Harlan is B., so I don’t know.
Harlan is B? Oh Jesus. This is just too much. Just so Harlan isn’t Asshat. I really don’t think I can take it if Asshat isn’t real.
I don’t even know what to say at this point. I’m losing faith. When people are as interested in your life as we are, coming clean is dangerous, but so is lying in the first place.
I’ve only been reading your blog for a few weeks now, but have gone back to the beginning and reas everything. Just to let you know, I really like your blog, your writing is amazing, and with the number of people reading it, I assume others like it as well. If blogging makes you feel better, keep doing it. Fuck all the idiots who make rude comments - they’re opinion doesn’t matter anyway. It’s just a bunch of negative shit that you should avoid like the plague - perhaps even delete them!
Anyway, honesty is always best, and I really appreciate you telling me such a hard story. I hope you feel better after telling it, and that you’ve learned from your mistakes. How are you going to blog from prison? Perhaps you can write me letters, and I can reproduce them on the Internet for you? ;)
Take care mate!
P.S. If B. is a good thing for you right now, stick with her! (I’m sure you already knew that…)
CC is definitely Harlan giving himself a pep talk and us the finger.
Good point Con!
And Amy, take your ‘grrr’s’ to a real blog with a real author who needs your saccharine. The real people here (all three of us) are nauseated by it and you look like an ass.
Hmm, I wonder where H is? I’ve been expecting him to show up in the comments in his usual indignant manner, ranting and raving about how horrible we are.
HA HA HA!! CC was posting at the same time I was….but, you’re right Jax, this is SO the H man. Just as indignant as always.
H…I’m sure you’ve done all this before. It’s too bad you suck so badly at hiding.
Sorry, Jaxon, I’m only a writing project.
Ah, Harlan, your writing is getting a little boring. This was a bit more out there than I would expect. I am sad that you didn’t connsumate your relationship with Bertha, I really hope you both get that taken care of.
I forgot to mention that I think you should tell B. the truth, whatever that may be. Hopefully give B. the money she lent and see where it goes.
Asshat, do you mind if I call you Mr. Durden?
Gawd, I wish I was real.
Those pens will end up being the most expensive thing you never bought.
Jackie, he didn’t buy them, hence (paradoxically) their high cost.
Jackie-I get it!
Leland-try going over Jackie’s post again.
Self-wipe that grin off your face.
Am I remembering correctly? Did Harlan mention In The Country Of Old Men as one of his favorite movies? If so, it just figures. I watched that movie tonight. Not only was it horrible, but in that horrible way that you can’t stop watching (sort of like this blog), but the ending sucked so wide that I stood up and started screaming. Good thing I wasn’t in the theater. Worst ending on a movie ever. EVER.
Sorry, got the title wrong. It’s No Country For Old Men. Wouldn’t want to get the title wrong the movie that should have been titled: Sucks Wide With the worst Ending Ever.
Hey… I think you deserve sympathy. It takes tons and tons of guts to come clean - even if it is with people who dont know you from Adam. I’m sorry you had to end up in that horrrible prison cell. Really - no one should have to, but it happens cos ’shit happens’. Sometimes we make shit happen. But the important thing out of all this is - what are you going to do about it? Will u decide never to do this again? Will u decide ‘what the heck, its happened once, I’ll just keep at it?’.
That’s the important part. Its ur decision, but I hope, for ur sake, that you make the right one. Hope ur feeling better now. I’m sorry u had to go through this. But remember, this too shall pass.
Be honest with B. - it seems the best thing to do (I assume she meant this kind of thing when she said ‘we need to talk/share’).
Stay strong.
Harlan: Hope it helps to know that I’ve been there, and I can still feel the all-encompassing shame. It is a very dehumanizing experience, and that, I believe, is one of the points. Aberrant behavior deterrent and all that.
As you haven’t asked, I won’t add to the advice, but please know that in this case you’re not so very alone.
Rose, did you honestly mean it when you said “I’m sorry you had to end up in that horrrible prison cell. Really - no one should have to”???? Tell me what should we do with pediphiles, rapists or murderers? Not that I’m comparing this fictional character to those types…although, this fictional character certainly deserves to have sat in a jail cell because he is a thief and has no guilt and no intention of stopping.
Tell us Rose…should we hug these scum-bags and blame it on their mommy’s & daddy’s OR better yet, the Bertha’s in their lives?
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