A Little Chat
Posted by harlan on 18 Dec 2007 at 12:49 pm | Tagged as: talking to the void
Yesterday, I vowed publicly that I would go talk to “Jane,” and I soon regretted that decision. Towards the end of the day, my hands were sweaty and I had used the restroom four times in the last hour. At 4:45, the appointed hour arrived. I was thinking at the time that it would be much easier for me to storm Omaha beach on D-Day than to go talk to Jane. Sure, Germans would be riddling the beach with shells and machine-gun bullets, but at least I wouldn’t have to talk to anyone, unless I needed to shout “Medic!” but it seemed like that would come naturally.
I found myself standing up on wobbly legs and moving slowly out in the hallway towards Jane’s cube. It was as if some external force were grabbing me by the collar and leading me along. The hallway seemed to narrow and lengthen like in a horror movie, yet I arrived at Jane’s cubicle much earlier than expected. I wanted to use the restroom again. To my dismay, Jane was sitting there. I was secretly hoping that she had gone so that I could get credit for attempting a courageous act without having to actually talk.
Jane has a pleasant but crowded cubicle. The floor is covered with plants, and her desk has a water fountain with a little Buddha guy fishing on top of a rock, a terrarium with some unseen animal inside, a candy jar that anyone can eat from, more plants, and lots of pictures of birds and foreign places like the Taj Mahal.
“Hi Harlan,” she said, smiling. She knew my name.
“Hello,” I said, instantly cursing myself for not having said “hi.” I took some comfort in the fact that I would be dead in fifty years.
There was a pause. I thought it was her turn to talk, but she seemed to want me to talk. I tried to look relaxed by crossing my legs and placing my hand on her half wall, but it had the opposite effect. There was too much strain on my arm, so I felt like I was doing a one-arm push-up. So I stood up straight and folded him arms.
“I was just wondering . . .” I said, but I stopped, not knowing what to say next. Jane has a birthmark rash on the side of her neck that looks like a deformed hand crawling up out of her collar. For some reason, this rash comforted me, and I continued.
“I was wondering if you knew that the Neptune server is shutting down this Friday evening for maintenance,” I blurted.
“Oh, I don’t, um,” she stammered. “Hey, are you going to the Christmas party?”
I wanted to say that there is a less than zero percent chance that I would ever go to any Christmas party, but I didn’t.
“Sure.”
“Great, I’ll see you Thursday night, m’kay?”
My heart wings carried me back to my cubicle. Oh sweet Jane. Oh sweet, sweet Jane!
Harlan, it looks like you are going to have to drink heavily at the christmas party
I don’t know about the Christmas party. Those things are usually such uptight affairs where people who don’t really known each other suddenly realize they have absoluetly nothing in common.
They typically have a negative energy about them due to the inherent christian guilt. Oh there’s sweet baby Jesus; you know that they’re going to beat him and whip him and nail him to a cross and then starve him and stab him, right? All because of you and your disgusting sins.
You definitely don’t want that type of drag associated with you.
I’d definitely skip it.
Cologne, Harlan, cologne. Wear lots of cologne. My cologne made me a big hit at my office party last year. Everybody was talking about me.
Glad you talked to her! At least it’s a start!
oh dear. don’t listen to these yahoos. Don’t drink too much, don’t wear a ton of cologne, and definitely don’t skip it altogether. This is your shot! She basically asked you on a date–don’t blow it.
Be yourself,tell her she looks nice, get her some food or a drink..you’ll be great!
I vow to help you land a date with Jane. =) Read below…
First of all you need to learn this:
It’s not desperation - it’s interest that you have an Jane
Asking Jane out for a date without looking desperate. It’s simple, dude. Just do what I tell you to do.
You have the vastly mistaken notion that any forward move toward this girl is going to be seen as desperation. But not if you go in slowly… slowly
Your thinking - I could never ask Jane out… phhst your wrong dude.
Why would the conversation be awkward if you ask Jane out? If you’re stumped about what to talk to Jane about leading into asking her out, just ask her about the classes she’s taking in college or how was her weekend? Now lets seal a date.. dont ask for a date…
say “I am heading over to Starbucks after work you should join me”
By all means pay for both coffee’s.. this will show your intrest level in her… GET HER NUMBER after you see the conversation is starting to die down.. say maybe we can grab dinner or lunch some time soon. ask for her number and make a call a few days later…..
Sounds easy eh?? =) Do yourself a favor and at least TRY this. If you crash and burn - chalk it up as pratice..
I forgot to say do this after the party… and after you speak with her some at the party… =)
good luck!! Let’s us know..